Highlights from the Blazers vs. Wolves game

Ok, some of you may know that I love going to Timberwolves games,
but it's not just for the basketball!  Here are some highlights from
last night's game:

1) T-shirt night.  Yay!  Who doesn’t love free t-shirts?  And they look good,
too - Black with the Timberwolves font in blue and silver on the front.
As a plus, this also means that I won't get suckered into signing up for my
10th credit card of the year in pursuit of a free Timberwolves T-shirt (I
ended up signing up for one anyway because this time they were giving away
knit hats).  My friend got TWO T-shirts - the guy at the size medium station
gave her another one, after she had already picked up a kid's size.  I thought
about trying to get another, especially since the guy right in front of me got
two by pretending to not speak English and pointing at the crowd as if
he was picking up one for someone else, but I eventually decide against it
because I didn't want to seem too cheap and greedy, even if I really am.

2) Pretty uneventful up to halftime (game notwithstanding).  The Wolves
are dominating the game, and are up by 20.  I was resisting the urge to
look at the cheerleaders through my binoculars so as not to incur the wrath
of my female companion and have to endure the silent treatment for the rest
of the night.  Mission successful so far, but I think that I have a favorite
- Alysia.  Judging by the way she dances and seems to smile in my direction,
I think she may like me, too (I may be dreaming on this one).  Anyway,
checking out the players’ shoes is a safe and acceptable binocular activity,
so I keep busy on that end.  As an Air Pippen fan and wearer of Air Pippen IV's,
I am particularly interested in Bonzi Wells, who wears the Air Pippen V, as
does Scottie Pippen.  I can’t really think of anyone else that wears someone
else's sponsored signature shoes, other than Air Jordans. Oh wait, Loren Woods
wears Iversons - go figure (shouldn't you wear the shoe of someone whose game
you'd like to emulate?).  Rasheed Wallace is sporting black patent leather
Air Dunks, circa 1980, and they look pretty sweet.  According to kicksology.net,
the shoes are painful to wear compared to today's shoes, but he also has a
custom insole made for him, so that must help.  I gotta admit they look
pretty slick.  Also, why do some of the bench players wear such crappy shoes?
You'd think they'd at least wear Nike Shox or SOMETHING that costs more than
65 bucks off the rack at Foot Locker (Gary Trent and Steve Kerr)?

3) Oh, I forgot to mention the end of the 1st quarter - they had a dance contest
at center court and this little kid who looks to be about 5 years old is dancing
like a cross between James Brown and Michael Jackson.  He's doing the moonwalk
forwards, backwards, AND sideways!  The crowd goes nuts over him, while the
shapely teenaged girl is doing her best to perpetuate the stereotype that 'white
people can’t dance.'  The other teenaged boy is even worse, trying to pop and
lock but looking more like an electroshock therapy patient than anything else. 
The 'celebrity judge' decides the winner, who is obviously the kid with a landslide
of audience applause.  More on the celebrity judge, later, though.

4) At halftime, Governor Jesse makes his way to his courtside seat (10 seats
down from Trent Tucker, and about 5 seats away from Jimmy Jam).  Wearing a faded
black T-shirt, jeans, and sneakers, he’s looking a lot more like 'Jesse the Belly'
than 'Jesse the Body.'  On the way he to his seat, he is greeted by the celebrity
judge.  I whip out the binoculars to try and see see who exactly this guy is…

5) It turns out that the celebrity judge is MC Hammer, or at least I think it is.
What is Hammer doing in Minneapolis?  Well, he’s sitting underneath the basket at
a Timberwolves game right now.  Is he really a Timberwolves fan?  I ask my friend
for confirmation, and she thinks that it’s not him.  My initial suspicions are
confirmed later in the 3rd quarter, however, when the upper deck behind him starts
chanting 'M-C-HAM-MER (clap, clap, clap clap clap)' and '2 Legit, 2 Legit to quit.'
Everyone cheers when he finally turns around to acknowledge the rowdy fans in the
cheap seats.  On the way out, a "fan" is raving to anyone within earshot about
having his Timberwolves game ticket personally autographed by MC Hammer.

6) Oh, what about the game?  Led by Bonzi Wells, who eventually finished with 34
points, the Jail Blazers start firing away 3 pters in the 3rd quarter to close
the gap to 7 points at 77-70, but they never seriously challenge for the lead and
the Wolves eventually win behind 30 pts from Wally World.

What a fun night!  I didn't even mention the macho nachos and popcorn, and we also
capped off the night with some hand-mixed ice cream at Cold Stone and some video
games at Gameworks.  I love going to Timberwolves games!